'Tis the Season!

Nothing like the Happy Holidays to get people stressed out!


I was thinking philosophically this morning about cost-benefit analysis. ("Cost–benefit analysis is a systematic process for calculating and comparing benefits and costs of a project for two purposes: (1)to determine if it is a sound investment, (2) to see how it compares with alternate projects. It involves comparing the total expected cost of each option against the total expected benefits, to see whether the benefits outweigh the costs, and by how much.") Things like this happen when you're married to a supply-chain guy. Anyway. Since our family grew this summer, I've spent a lot more time mentally going over the cost, including physical, mental, and $$, of all that we do with and for the kids vs. the benefit of those activities. I have come to find that many of the activities that we do with the kids have a high cost. Not only do they cost $$, but it takes a lot of Dave and I's physical energy to plan, prepare, and execute activities with our larger family. Not only that, but included in the cost is the fact that the kids often don't appreciate or enjoy these activities, or they become overstimulated and cranky by the end, adding to our emotional cost. The benefit of such activities, such as having fun as a family, or exposing kids to new experiences, often seem to get lost as the cost grows.

I am learning that simple seems to be the best. Higher cost does not always equal more benefit where kids are concerned. Luke 14:28 reads "For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it?" I am learning to count the cost of just about everything I do, to make sure 1, it's worth the effort, and 2, I have sufficient energy and ability to finish it and be happy with the result. That doesn't mean that we don't do things as a family- it just means that we are learning to keep it simple!

I am looking forward to a relatively stress-free Christmas this year. Usually we travel to see family for Christmas which I love, but travelling with kids is always stressful. Although we will miss seeing our family, it will be nice to spend time doing all the Christmas stuff around here that we miss out on because we're not here. In addition to not travelling, we're keeping gifts for the kids simple and few and we were able to do a lot of our shopping online instead of braving the crowds at the stores. More is not always better so we're trying to get just a few things for each kid that they'll be happy with.

On a side note, I have 9 siblings, so instead of getting gifts for everyone, we do a gift exchange where we are assigned one sibling/family to get gifts for. This year we are doing an ornament exchange. I was assigned my sister and her family, and it was so fun to think about my sister's personality and make ornaments personalized for her. This is what I made her.

Happy Halloween 2011

I'll admit it- I like Halloween. Not the horror-movie, blood n' guts, creepy crawly kind of halloween; I like the pumpkins, dress-up, your neighbors are so nice they give you candy when you show up on their doorstep kind of halloween. I like putting the spiderweb up over my front door and handing out candy. I also love making costumes every year for the kids. This year I was the traditional witch ("like I am everyday!" I told Ellie), the two babies were Thing 1 and Thing 2 from and Dave was the Cat from Dr. Seuss' book, and Amari and Ellie were Rainbow Magic fairies from Ellie's favorite books. We did trunk-or-treating at the church last night and the kids had a great time. Leah and Joseph were both covered in chocolate drool from helping themselves to unwrapped candy during the event. Dave will take the big girls out again tomorrow so the fun continues on! Have a great Halloween and enjoy the pictures!

Hope, Fear, and Motherhood

http://lds.org/ensign/1997/05/because-she-is-a-mother

I was reading this article a friend linked to in her post and it brought tears to my eyes while I read it because I thought "here is someone who understands." It is a hard thing to be a mother. As a mother I desperately want to do everything "right". I feel so much pressure to see to all my children's physical, emotional, and spiritual needs. I also feel like I fall short of my own expectations so often. I run out of energy. I am not always as patient or loving as I should be. I worry that I am not teaching my children the things they need to know to have a good relationship with God. I guess you could say I have a lot of fears-both about my own abilities, and fears about my children, specifically me failing them in some way.

This article reminded me of a quote on the fridge at my aunt's house. We visited her when we were in Utah picking up the kids and I thought it was profound.

It is "Believe in your hopes, not your fears."

I also thought about a scripture in 2 Timothy 1:7 "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."

I guess I need to see that my fears help no one. God has given me power to act and do my best. He has given me a sound mind, to use to work through the problems and difficulties that are inherent in motherhood. He has also given me the ability to love and a wonderful family to share my love with.

Elder Jeffery R Holland said in this talk "If you and your husband will strive to love God and live the gospel yourselves; if you will plead for that guidance and comfort of the Holy Spirit promised to the faithful; if you will go to the temple to both make and claim the promises of the most sacred covenants a woman or man can make in this world; if you will show others, including your children, the same caring, compassionate, forgiving heart you want heaven to show you; if you try your best to be the best parent you can be, you will have done all that a human being can do and all that God expects you to do."

I can do this. I am going to try and let go of my fears, and hold on to the hopes that I have for myself, my husband, and my children. I pray every day for God's help in my life and in my parenting- I guess now's the time to have a little more faith that together with His help I can do and be all that He expects of me.

Bountiful Baskets

I just tried Bountiful Baskets for the first time and since I know some of you are interested, I thought I would blog about it. It is a produce co-op of sorts- you make a "donation" online, the org uses your combined funds to get good deals on produce, and they divide the stuff up and you go pick up your baskets of produce at a pre-determined time on the weekend. We just got a new location opening up near us so I decided to give it a try to see if I got my money's worth out of it.

I set up an account online and waited for a weekend that pick-up time wasn't the same as soccer time. This weekend worked out. You can only order online from Monday at noon until Tuesday sometime, and when they run out of baskets, you're out of luck. Plus, I think it's only every other week. Anyhow, Monday night I ordered my baskets. It normally costs $15 plus a $1.50 fee, so $16.50 total, but for first-timers they add $3.00. You can also buy bread and seasonal stuff if it's available. I skipped all that since I am just starting out, but according to the gal in line in front of me, their bread is really good. My total cost was $19.50 since it was my first time.

The truck was late, so we waited in line for a while, but finally it got moving and I showed my receipt, the volunteer brought my two baskets out (I ordered 1 but they divide 1 order into two baskets so things don't get squashed), and I transferred the produce to my box. Here's what I got this week. Keep in mind that every week it is different depending on what they buy.

1 Romaine lettuce head
3 Avocados
4 giant plums
5 on-the-vine tomatoes
4 broccoli heads
5 apples
6 pears
2 cucumbers
1 head of garlic
1 bag red grapes
2 lbs carrots
8 bananas
1 head cauliflower

All in all I felt like it was pretty nice produce and a good amount. Complaints from the ladies in front of me were that it doesn't seem to last as long as grocery store produce, but I guess I'll see for myself.

The pros seem to be good value, fun variety, good for the environment with less packaging, the cons seem to be the process of ordering online and pick up time on the weekend, and taking what you get even if it's not stuff you use or the wrong amount.

With all that said though, I will definitely go again. If you want to know more or see if there is a co-op in your area, check out their web site!

Soccer Time!

It's soccer time again! This season the kids moved to a bigger field and started playing positions. Ellie's team this year is the "Lady Pumas." The kids all seem a little confused about where they're supposed to be now that they have positions to play but our team did really on Saturday and won the game despite the confusion. It's fun to watch Ellie play!

One big happy family

Well well well. We have had our new family together for several weeks now. It has honestly been quite an adventure. Like all good adventures, there have been the times where it is really tough and I feel like giving up and there have been times when everything is going smoothly and I think we have a pretty good thing going on here. Interestingly enough, Amari and Joseph (yes, we are calling him Joseph now)have settled in much better than expected. The challenge has been with our biological children who I guess feel a little displaced by the "new kids." Leah has been pretty clingy and hits a lot lately, and Ellie...drama drama drama. She is fine one minute and then the littlest thing sets her off into tantrums. We have been trying to be loving, understanding parents knowing that this is a big adjustment, but we keep telling her "the feelings are ok but the behavior is not." I hope going back to school tomorrow and having her own "thing" again will help with this.

Despite Ellie's outbursts, Amari loves her and copies everything she does. Amari is a strong-willed little critter but is smart and loving and is starting to make friends at church and feel more comfortable here.

Joseph is my little "Mama's boy" and is starting to slowly warm up to Dave. He loves to play and tease and have fun. His laugh is such a happy sound it makes me smile every time. He and Leah are just starting to get comfortable together and spent a half-hour today sliding my bathroom closet doors open and shut and going in and out together. I think they are on their way to becoming good friends.

Dave and I are definitely leaning on each other for support through all this. We've each had our moments where we feel like we just can't handle things anymore but as long as we both don't have that moment at the same time we'll be ok! :) I know I'm starting to feel more confidant in my ability to take care of everyone but there are sure days that push my patience to the max. With the spacing between Ellie and Leah we've never had to deal with more than one little one at a time so there is a learning curve here for us.

At the end of the day though, we are so grateful for our "new and improved" family. There is a well-known quote "I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it." and that is how Dave and I feel. Long after the difficulties of these years pass we will continue to enjoy the blessings of this wonderful family.

And behind curtain #2...

Here's the big news I promised yesterday..no, I am not pregnant...but we are expecting! Dave and I were offered the opportunity several months ago to pursue the adoption of my niece and nephew, a little boy age one and a little girl age 2. As many of you know Dave and I have struggled with fertility issues and we have often discussed adoption in the past. We love the idea of having these precious kids join our family. It is an unfortunate situation with their parents and there is still ongoing legal stuff, but today we were awarded temporary legal custody of the kids which means we can have them live with us while legal things with their biological parents are ongoing. I was able to make travel plans today and we will be bringing the children to live with us at the beginning of August.

This whole thing has been a pretty wild ride. In the interest of protecting the privacy of family members involved I won't go into details but I will say, this has been an emotional roller coaster for both Dave and I. It was both scary and exciting to make the decision to pursue this, (doubling our children! buying a minivan! 3 kids under age three!) and now that we're emotionally involved, each new delay and setback is heartbreaking. We ask that those of you who pray remember us in our prayers as we all adjust to living together as a family and that the children's best interest will be protected as the legal case with their biological parents continues on.

What's behind curtain #1?

In preparation for some big changes coming up in our lives (stay tuned for the exciting news tomorrow!) we have been re-arranging rooms upstairs. Ellie got moved into the middle (bigger) bedroom which used to be the guest room. We bought her a bunkbed which she loves and moved all her furniture and decorations. The room looked good, but lacked a curtain for the window. I decided to let Ellie go to the fabric store with me to help pick out some fabric for a curtain. The only thing I forgot was that I can't sew. Not that that detail ever comes up in my crafty fantasies where I'm Martha Stewert coming up with designer looks personalized to my daughter's taste all the while saving my family oodles of dollars. Anyway. After Ellie suggesting several wildly expensive/boldly floral/overly sequined fabrics, I finally convinced her to go with some pink lace that I would line with some fabric I already had. It was so pretty in my head. I measured several times, then started sewing. After spending an hour fighting with several giant sheets of fabric, I had a square that looked pretty good (if the room was dark and you were standing in the hall and you squint a little). I got it up on the rod and suddenly I remembered- I can't sew! Yes, that curtain is about 6 inches too short for the window. Sigh.



The happy ending of the story is that while I stink at sewing and many other crafty things, I am very good at fixing stuff. Viola! A lovely valance!



The sad ending after the happy ending after the sad part was that a few days after the curtain debacle, I was browsing Walmart and found curtains that would have been super cute in Ellie's room. Cost? $2 more than what I spent at the fabric store.

Shock Waves

We celebrated Dave's birthday last night in a low-key way:dinner and birthday cake at our friend's house. Ellie was positive that Dave needed a piñata at his party, and decided that it should be a BYU football piñata. I went along with this because I have fond memories of making many piñatas in our basement growing up. We blew up a big balloon, covered it with newspaper dipped in paste, dried it and painted it in BYU colors. I will tell you after spending three days de-pasting my table that it is not as much fun as an adult to make these as it was when I was a kid.

The kids all got a turn to whack at it, then it was Dave's turn. The first whack sent a big hunk of the stick hurtling over my head but didn't damage the piñata at all. Second whack-same thing happened! Another hunk of stick, no damage to the piñata. Finally Dave stabbed it open. Apparently the shock of the blows had actually broken Tootsie rolls in half. Do you know how hard it is to break a tootsie roll? It's hard.
Happy Birthday Dave!

Just another day in Paradise

It's been a long time since Dave and I had a vacation without the kids. Sure, we've been away for a night or two here and there, but it was our 10 year anniversary and we wanted to do a big vacation with just the two of us. We decided that a week-long cruise was just the thing for us and have been planning this for months. My mom came in from Utah and took great care of the kids, and Dave and I had a fabulous adventure together in the Caribbean.

We drove down to Galveston on a Sunday and had a great time reading the signs along the way. Texas has a big conservative Christian population and they use road signs to combat the sin and degeneracy so common along major highways. Here are a few examples that kept us laughing. Billboard for Heartbreakers Gentleman's Club followed by billboard proclaiming "Jesus heals the Brokenhearted". A billboard proclaiming "Stop the Porn, be Reborn!" in front of an adult video store. And so on. I love Texas. I also had to laugh at a orange warning sign stating "Watch for smoke on the road". You bet! If I see smoke on the road, you can be sure I'll keep my eye on it! Random.

Anyway, we made it onto the cruise ship and sailed away. The first two days at sea were so relaxing. We were able to sleep in together, we would eat breakfast on the deck and sunbathe, we got to read, eat, and relax...so nice!



Monday we were on the front of the ship and looked over the edge and say whole flocks of flying fish skimming the waves away from the ship. It was pretty awesome! They would travel for 60 to 100 feet before disappearing back beneath the waves.

Every night we would go to dinner and enjoy some family-friendly comedy or watch a show then sit out on deck or grab some late-night pizza and pineapple. We would go back to our room and be greeted by a freshly turned-down bed and a towel animal and chocolates. It just doesn't get better than that.



On Wednesday we pulled into Montego Bay, Jamaica.



We caught a bus to do some shopping and then go to the beach. It was an eye-opening tour of the country as we were driven around. There is a lot of poverty and people live in structures that would be condemned in the US. Our bus driver got pulled over by the police for speeding (no problem mon!)and I snapped this picture while we waited. This is oceanfront property people! In the US the land alone would be worth probably several hundred thousand dollars. It was a beautiful country but sad to see that the average citizen obviously doesn't profit much from all the tourism money that comes there.



We went to Doctor's Cave Beach after shopping and had a great time. The water is crystal clear and we ate jerk chicken and enjoyed the sea breeze and read our books in the shade of our beach umbrella. Look, we are who we are. And we were sunburned already.



Our next stop was Grand Caymen. This picture is us on the dock in front of our ship.




Caymen was cool. We did a snorkeling excursion and had an awesome time. Snorkeling at those coral reefs was like being able to stick our faces in an aquarium. Dozens of varieties of tropical fish and awesome coral formations. Sadly my underwater camera was worthless but I was able to get pictures of Dave petting the sting rays. For decades fishermen have cleaned their catch by these reefs so these sting rays are pretty tame and come whenever they hear boats anchoring in hopes of getting fed. I got to hold one and we both got to stroke their fins. It felt like a wet mushroom.



Our last stop was Cozumel, Mexico. There we took a bus to Tulum to see Mayan ruins. Our tour guide gave us some history and background on the Mayans and we got to hike around the ruins and see what they left behind. It was impressive and beautiful and a neat feeling to be where people had lived hundreds of years ago.



These lizards were everywhere- I wouldn't want to run into one on a dark night!


Location location location- the Mayans sure picked a good one!


After Mexico the boat headed back to Galveston. This picture is of our friends, Brad and Linda who shared our table in the dining room every night and hung out with us in the evenings. We all tried to be adventurous with the menu (I tried a snail!) but for dessert every night we would order this amazing Chocolate Melting Cake. (Except Brad, he didn't like chocolate. Crazy.) Anyway, Young, our waiter, figured us out pretty quickly and by the end of the cruise he would just bring us what we wanted for dessert without us having to order. Darn it, now I'm hungry for chocolate melting cake.


It was wonderful for Dave and I to be able to spend so much time together and we had such a great time and some great adventures. We definitely won't wait another ten years before we do this again!

Never trust a quiet toddler

I should have known better. I was happily emailing people, Leah was happily cleaning out the pantry. Quietly. That should have been a major warning. She came crawling into the office, dripping chocolate drool, and literally covered head to toe with Dove Dark Chocolate. When I checked her mouth she still was sucking happily on the foil wrapper-apparently she had just shoved the entire wrapped square in her mouth. At least we know she has good taste in chocolate.

Look, a squirrel!

Both Leah and the dog love going on walks so I've been trying to get out walking with them more often. This morning we went walking on our greenbelt, a strip of ponds and forest that has a nice path down the middle. It was chilly but it is so beautiful in the morning. The air was fresh and smelled like honeysuckle and grass and we saw a beautiful white heron on the edge of the pond. I really wished I had my camera with me! On the way home I thought about all the good things I've been blessed with. It put me in a good mood and I'm looking forward to a great day with friends, my kids, and my husband!

Leah's One!

Happy Birthday to Leah!

Birth


1 month


2 months


3 months


4 months


5 months


6 months


7 months


8 months


9 months


10 months


11 Months



1 year old!


It's really hard to believe it's been an entire year since we welcomed our little miracle baby into our family. She is such a joy in our lives. She is a busy little girl, crawling, climbing, and go go going all the time. She loves to play with Ellie and the dog, pretend she's shy when other people look at her, and race up the stairs when no one's watching.




This girl loved her birthday cake. I made the Chocolate mousse crunch cake from one of my favorite food web sites and made a big one for us and a tiny one for Leah. She loved it and had a great time destroying it! She is a precious girl and we are so grateful to have her as part of our family.